Thank you so much to gothic_lolita2 for your review. I'm pleased to see that you enjoyed the first chapter and as you asked, here is the second one. Hope that you'll enjoy this and review again.
And to the other people that may read this: Please review if you can!
Disclaimer: I don't own Will and Grace or its characters. The chapter subtitle is from the song Sleepless Nights by Norah Jones.
Reality Sets In… Again
‘Somehow through the days,
I don’t give in…’
I woke up to the sound of music, blaring directly into my ear. I let out a frustrated scream, which was covered up by the song playing, and covered my head with one of my pillows. When the music would not stop and let me go back to sleep, I peeked out from under the pillow. I saw that on the nightstand next to my bed was a radio alarm clock. A scowl covering my face, I reached out and snatched the stupid thing, flinging it away as hard as I could.
“Look lady, those alarms aren’t cheap and they are the only thing that keeps you awake,” Rosario said, ducking out of the way of the clock as it shattered against the wall.
“Get out of here,” I said, covering my head with the sheets. “And stop getting those damn alarm clocks.”
“How are you supposed to get up then?” Rosario asked, her voice nearing me. “Come on Miss Karen.”
“No! God damn it Rosie,” I said, completely irritated as she pulled on my arm. “And let me go!”
“Mister Jack is waiting for you to go to lunch, and he’s going to knock something of yours over the way he’s jumping around there,” Rosario said after a moment.
I bit back a loud curse; she knew exactly what I needed to hear to get out of bed. “Alright you win,” I said as angrily as I could, even though I wanted to see Jack. “I’m getting up. Go tell Jackie I’ll be right down. And make me a martini!” I watched as Rosario left the room and then literally dragged myself to my bathroom. Peering into the mirror, I bit my lower lip and remembered my dream from the night before.
“Fuck,” I muttered. “It happened again… No more Jack Daniels after midnight for me.” That didn’t help though, since my mind was flooded with images of my poodle and me, making love. “Stop it!” I yelled, shaking my head as hard as I could.
“Your fairy boyfriend has arrived!” a voice suddenly said behind me. “Kare?”
“Jack, didn’t Rosario tell you I was going to come down?” I yelled in surprise as Jack appeared behind me.
“Um, I wanted to surprise you,” Jack said, looking hurt.
Sighing, I turned and walked over to where he was standing. “I’m sorry honey; I didn’t get a good night’s sleep last night. I had a… dream,” I told him. I wanted to say ‘bad;’ but it wasn’t a bad dream, it was amazing.
“Ohh, was it a naughty one?” Jack asked eagerly. When I closed my eyes, he said, “Nightmare?”
“No, it was just… unreal,” I said, pleased that I’d found a word. “Now let me get ready for the day Jackie and then the two of us can go out and charge up my cards.”
“Yay!” Jack said in happiness. He went up to me and kissed me on the lips quickly. “Love ya Karebear!” he called before he bounded out of the bathroom, leaving me alone.
“Sometimes I think you’re blind Jack,” I whispered to myself as I walked to my closet. ‘Wait,’ I thought. ‘Why would he be blind?’ Unfortunately, the stupid voice that was in the back of my mind was very quick to answer that question.
‘Since when do you have erotic dreams about your gay best friend?’ was the snotty reply.
“I’ve had dreams about my poodle before though,” I snapped, pulling off my nightgown. “And so what if it was the two of us having sex this time?”
‘Don’t you remember the past week? The other dreams you’ve had? This isn’t a one time thing Karen Walker,’ the voice said.
“Alright, so then it means I need sex and I need it now,” I said as I buttoned my blouse. “I’ll take a look around Barney’s while I’m shopping and then that’ll be it.”
‘Why don’t you just take Jack with you in the dressing room? Then you can make love to him and the dreams will stop then.’
“Just because I make love to Jack McFarland?” I said, bursting out into laughter. “Oh my god, that’s pretty hilarious.” I pretended to wipe a tear from my eye and then hurried to put on my make up. Although I was done with the subject of my recent dreams, the damn voice wasn’t.
‘What’s so funny about making love to Jack?’ it said. ‘You do love him don’t you?’
“Of course, but not like that,” I said quickly. “And besides, he’s gay, which means he doesn’t want to make love to me. So the dreams are just from me not getting enough and that’s it. Tonight I’m gonna take a bunch of pills and sleep and there won’t be anymore dreams.” I waited for a moment, and when no voice responded to what I had said, I smirked at my reflection. “Time to pamper myself silly,” I muttered and then turned to join my Jackie, pushing the dreams from my mind.
Sitting in and armchair in Karen’s living room, I tapped my tennis shoes on the carpet furiously, impatient to get out of there and shop. After a while, who knows how long, I got up and hurried to the doorway, looking at the staircase.
No Karen yet.
I went back inside and shifting from foot to foot, I looked around me, desperate to find something that would occupy my time for a second or two. Seeing the piano, I got an idea and grinned widely, walking towards it. I sat at the bench and then lifted the cover off the keys. My fingers were poised, at the ready, when I heard the sound of heels on the wood of the stairs. I began to play then, closing my eyes and trying to remember all the necessary notes so I wouldn’t mess up.
“Jack,” Karen said from behind me. Her voice had a weird quality to it, something I’d never heard in it before.
I turned to her and saw that she was smiling at me; but there was a strange look in her eyes. “Okay?” I asked.
Gasping, Karen turned her head away from me and I got even more worried.
“Did I say something wrong?” I asked, getting up quickly. She didn’t answer me so I went to her and wrapped my arms around her. “Come on Kare, you should be happy, we’re gonna shop till we drop!”
Giggling slightly, to my relief, Karen looked up at me for a second before putting her arms around me and laying her head on my chest. “I love you poodle, you know that right?” she murmured softly.
“Course I do Karen,” I said, hugging her briefly. I then moved my hands down to her ass and gave it a quick squeeze, grinning widely when she laughed. “And I love you too.”
“Let’s go then,” Karen said, stepping away from me. She was smiling, but that look; which I still could not place; was in her eyes still. “Lemme get my coat okay?”
“Sure thing Kare,” I said and I followed her out into the foyer of the penthouse. “I heard that there are new winter coats at Barney’s,” I told her excitedly while I helped her with her fur coat.
“They’re late this year,” Karen said, looking distracted. “It’s the end of November, almost December. Thank god they put their fur coats out early so I could get mine.”
“Me too, you look beeautiful Karen,” I said as she turned to me.
“Aw, you’re so sweet poodle,” Karen said to me. She reached out and took my hand, squeezing it tightly. “If only you weren’t gay.”
I could have sworn I saw something flicker in her eyes then; something like hope; and then I spoke. “And if you were a man…”
“W-we’re wasting daylight honey,” Karen said, stumbling over the first word. She ignored my widened eyes and pulled me out of the penthouse as she slung her purse over her shoulder.
Something was wrong with my Karebear, and I knew that I had to find out what that was exactly. After all, as her poodle I had some obligations, most important of which was being her best friend.
Standing in front of Karen as she placed a shirt against my chest much later; during the evening; in the men’s department of Barney’s, I took some time to study her. In all the years that I had known her, she was always either drunk or heped up on pills. I didn’t care about that really, she didn’t judge me for being gay, and I wasn’t about to judge her for her addictions. It amazed me all the time that even though Karen was a boozer and a pill popper (two things she even called herself), she could retain her attractiveness.
I know, I am a gay man, but that doesn’t mean I don’t see when a woman is beautiful. And my Karebear is gorgeous. I wonder sometimes, when it’s very late at night and I’m at that point of half sleep, what it would be like to kiss her. And when I mean kiss her, I mean kissing her as if she was the only thing I needed to survive in the world. I’ve never felt that way about any guy, and I wonder if Karen had felt that way either in her life. But it doesn’t really matter, I’m gay, so it’s not like I’m looking for love from a woman; from Karen. Still, I can’t help but wonder…
“Poodle, wake up!” Karen said then, snapping her fingers in front of my face. “You’re off in lala land there, come back to me!”
“I’m back,” I said quickly, shaking my head. “What’s up?”
Karen laughed and rolled her eyes. “I’ve been trying to get you to come with me and you ask me what’s up as if you haven’t been standing there spacing out in front of me,” she told me.
“Sorry Kare, I really am, but I was thinking,” I said, trying to give her my best ‘puppy dog’ look.
“Don’t worry Jackie,” Karen said, walking towards the entrance of the store. “Who is he?”
“What?” I asked, a little startled.
“The guy that you were thinking about,” Karen said. She sighed impatiently at my confused look and then said, “I’ve never seen you that deep in thought about anything else and-”
“What?” she asked, now looking confused herself.
“I was thinking about you Karebear,” I told her. “Who says I can’t think about you?” I was dismayed to find that she looked worried and reached out to touch her.
“I want to go home Jackie,” Karen said, stepping out of my reach. “Let’s go.”
Feeling hurt, and worried, I was going to walk after her when a happened to turn to the cash register we were near. “Karen!” I hissed to get her attention.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, turning to me.
“Look, that guy at the register, he looks deliiicious,” I said, trying not to stare too hard at the man. “Think I should try?”
“If you want,” Karen said. “But I’m not waiting for you, I’m tired and I want some booze. I’ll give you ten minutes Jack and if you’re not in the limo by then, by yourself, I’m leaving you here.”
“But it’s snowing and-” I began to say. “Kare!” I cried when she abruptly turned and left me there. I shrugged and then looked at my watch, then at the guy. “Time to work my magic,” I said to myself before walking over to him.
He actually took about a half hour to come out to the limo, but I couldn’t leave with out him. I’d told Driver when I entered the limo that after ten minutes he was going to drive back to the penthouse, but I kept stopping him as time passed by. When I saw Jack, hurrying through the snow that was falling, I felt my heart lighten. He had a disappointed look on his face. “What’s wrong honey?” I asked as he settled next to me.
“He was straight,” Jack said, putting his head in my lap. He let out a deep sigh and said, “Hard to find a good man who’s gay in this city.”
“Even harder to find a straight man,” I commented, stroking his cheek absently.
‘And almost impossible for your gay best friend to turn straight, or even bi, and fall in love with you,’ the voice said, returning for the first time since that morning.
“Hey Karebear,” Jack was saying.
“What is it poodle?” I said.
“Think I’ll find a guy who will keep me occupied?” he said.
“You know I can’t answer that,” I told him, smiling. “I can’t keep a marriage together for more then twenty minutes, how am I supposed to know if you’ll ever be in a long term relationship?”
“I dunno, I just was wondering,” Jack said, shrugging. He got up then and sat on the bench across from me.
“Did I get some god awful perfume on me while we were over there?” I asked, feeling a little uncomfortable under his gaze.
“No, don’t worry Kare, you smell heavenly,” Jack said with a grin.
“Then what’s going on poodle, what’s the story, why did you move?” I asked in my hurried way.
“You’ve been showing a lot of emotions today; more then you show in a year,” Jack said. “And it’s making me worried.”
“Oh, that,” I said nonchalantly as possible, waving my hand. “You came so soon today I didn’t get a chance to have my morning drinks. But look Jackie, I’ve got my trusty martini and I’m feeling much better.”
Jack smiled then and bounced, I don’t know how he can do that in a limo, to me again. “Can we go shopping again tomorrow Kare?” he asked eagerly as we neared 155 Riverside.
“It’s Monday tomorrow,” I said, rolling my eyes. “I have to make an appearance at work.”
“Oh yeah,” Jack said, looking sad. “Wait, what did you mean by appearance?”
“You’re smart aren’t you Jackie?” I said, letting a smile creep on to my face. “I only need to show up for an hour and then you and I can go Christmas shopping.”
“Yay!” Jack said, clapping his hands together. “But who are we going to shop for?”
“Will and Grace of course,” I said as seriously as I could. “And I need to get a little something for Rosie too.”
We stared at each other, silence for a few seconds until we both burst out in wild laughter, leaning against each other as we literally started to cry.
“Ah Kare, you’re such a great friend,” Jack said when we’d calmed down. “And let’s definitely start Christmas shopping for ourselves tomorrow.”
“We should get something for each other too,” I said after watching him for a moment. I put my hand on his cheek and said, “What do you want for Christmas honey?”
“You Karebear,” Jack said, looking into my eyes.
I smiled again and shook my head. “You’re such a kidder Jackie,” I said.
“Well, can I have your friendship?” Jack asked as the limo came to a halt.
“You already do and you’ll have it forever,” I said. I made a face and then said, “Sorry, that was something really Will and Grace to say. But I’m sure you get what I mean.”
“Sure do Karen,” Jack said. “Okay, thanks for the shopping trip, we’ll definitely have this much fun tomorrow.” Before he left the limo to go to his apartment, he kissed me on the cheek. “Love you,” he said easily and then left.
“I love you too,” I murmured. Sighing, I leaned back against my seat as the limo started down the street. As I sipped on my third martini since I’d gotten into the car, I wondered idly if my sex dreams would come tonight. I was kind of hoping they would, but then I got a hold of myself. “You’re acting stupid again Walker,” I said. But that didn’t stop me from recalling my dreams, the way I felt making love to Jack, the way I imagined he felt about making love to me in them.
The limo continued on to my penthouse, and I was lost in a fog of memories; of my body and Jack’s entwined and writhing. Both of us sweating from our undulations, but neither of us caring at all about that. When I remembered our kisses, sweet and slow then building up to something more passionate and fiery, my fingers drifted up to my cheek where Jack had kissed me. I let out a deep sigh before I drowned myself in my liquor once again, trying to forget everything, but unable to, since with me all the time were a pair of soft blue eyes. And no matter how much I drank or took, he was always with me.